Thursday, May 1, 2008

Just Being Here

It is the first of May. A Thursday. A partly rainy spring day. I have been a cancer survivor for four months now. [I was told early on that cancer survival begins with diagnosis.] For four months, I have been engaged in this battle with Ewing's sarcoma. It appears that I am winning the battle, but some days I am not so sure. I'll leave that up to God (as if I have a choice).

This is the part of my cycle where my blood counts are somewhat back to normal and I am able to get out of the house (for reasons other than seeing a doctor, having a test, or getting an injection). I call it my "frolic" time.

Today, I went on some errands with my wife. I have to sit in the back seat so I can keep my leg outstretched. And I am trying to avoid being a backseat driver. I sat in the car while she did her errands. We bought sandwiches and parked near the park to eat lunch.

Later, we picked up our daughter and younger son from school, then did some shopping. My daughter needed to buy a dress. So I sat in the car, napped, and did a few NY Times crossword puzzles while the rest of them went into the mall.

We ate dinner at Panera Bread, then headed home.

Now we are at home and everyone is about their school-night business. My wife is picking up - there is always picking up to do. My daughter is working on a school project. My son is getting ready for bed. He just came in to show me his school papers from today. In a few minutes, after his teeth are brushed, he will crawl up on the sofa bed for me to read to him. It's Winnie the Pooh tonight. And Tigger too.

For most people, this is probably not a description of a very exciting day. For me, I enjoyed being out and being more a part of a family activity. Just being there is important. For my son. For my daughter. For my wife. And for me. I am thankful that I get to be there. To be here.

It's really just another ordinary day. But I get to be here. Just being here is important.


Maddie said...

I love ordinary days. I think it is fantastic that you got to be present with your family as ordinary errands are accomplished. Truly, you are living in the moment and focusing on the here and now.

My one friend told me that all I need to do is ask God to give me the energy and strength to get through the day, and he will provide it. She was so wise and it helped me to get through one day at a time of treatment. She said he only promises today, the past is gone and the future is in his hands. I am still learning this lesson, but I work on it. I am a work in progress. LOL

Every time I go for a tretment, I get a bit freaked out. It's like the whole situation is put back in front of my face. One lady says it is like a big pink elephant living with us. At times he sits right next to us, and we can't avoid acknowledging him. Other times he shrinks and moves into the corner of the room, but he comes back out from time to time to sit beside us.

I am glad you had a day where he is relegated to the corner, and you go about living with your family. I am working back to that as the elephant was out to visit this week once more.

Life is beautiful. I thank God every day for the chance to live, and thank him each night for such a time with my family. He leads me, and I try to follow. It's amazing what you can do. No matter what, I can pray for others.

May you have another wonderful, ordinary day.

Anonymous said...

I am sending your web site to a dear friend who has an incurable disease; another friend who just had a detached retina operation and is healing, but must be very careful. I feel sure that they will receive encouragement from reading your testimonies of what God has done and is doing for you and your family.

May our Heavenly Father continue to bless and heal you is my daily prayer.


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