Wednesday, January 30, 2008

Putting on My Big Boy Boxers

We visited the oncologist at LVH yesterday. We had some good news and some bad news (But remember, God is always good!). The good news is that my white blood cell counts are up and I am not so vulnerable to infections. The bad news is that my red blood cell count is still low - so fatigue will continue to be a factor.

We also discovered today, via ultrasound, that I have a blood clot in my lower right leg. I have to give myself an injection of blood thinner in the belly each day for six days. Now, I do not like needles. Does anyone? I cannot even look at them when I have an injection or have blood drawn. But yesterday, I was told that I would have to learn to give myself injections. Whenever my daughter does not want to do something, we lovingly tell her that she needs to put on her big girls panties and deal with it. So, yesterday, I put on my big boy boxers and learned to give myself an injection. Here is an instance, men, when having a little extra fat around the mid-section is a definite plus!

We return to LVH on Friday for an MRI and another blood draw. On Monday, I have my third round of chemotherapy.

In the meantime, our daughter has to go to the doctor to be checked for a sinus infection, and our youngest son has to have a rash on his face checked. Yesterday, the passenger-side window in our van decided to stop working (the motor died) while in the down position during a rainstorm. Medical paperwork is piling up. Our oldest son’s paperwork for West Point is piling up. And there’s laundry. And dishes. And cleaning. And bills. And shopping. I list all these things not because I think that we have more on our plate than any other family, but because I know that we all deal with the same, or similar, pressures every day.

Life piles up. Life can be overwhelming.

We can throw up our hands and say, “I give up. I quit.” But that accomplishes nothing. That just puts us deeper in the mire.

We can drown in the details, unless we learn to cling to the Lifesaver. Unless we learn to trust the God who is sovereign over the details. Unless we believe, with every fiber of our being, that God is good – all the time.

We can’t handle it all on our own. [We may think we can. And maybe we can, for a season. But we all get to a point, eventually, where it is too much to bear on our own.] We need Him. I need Him. I am reminded of this fact every day. And I am so thankful that the God who met my greatest need – to be saved from sin and death – also meets my daily needs. Because He loves me and He knows what is best for me. He may not always meet my need in the way that I think it needs to be met or in the time frame that I think it need to be met in, but He always meets my need according to his good and perfect will – always in a way that is best for me and for my growth in Christlikeness.

To end on a lighter note, today I am going to the barber shop to have my head shaved. A few bristles of hair have managed to cling to my balding pate, but today is the day of reckoning.

May God be real in your life today!

1 comment:

Michael Family Blessings said...

I don’t know what to say about the points you raised. I have undergone Family Blessings a lot of times now, so I guess I couldn’t put in a negative word or two. I do like how you got your views across. Good luck to you.